Meditative

Another day with nothing, but chores to do. There was schooling followed by laundry and I was just exhausted for no good reason. I was also plagued by the feeling that something had gone horribly  awry, but what and how were a complete mystery. This left me feeling anxious and a little stir crazy with no projects, so I crocheted.

Having a small stash of project-less yarn, I just dug in, picked something innocuous and started to work a nice repetitive pattern. I hoped it would act as a meditative force and it did. Sure, I'll likely have nothing to show for the effort, but it calmed and centered and most importantly it kept my hands busy. That is vital.

The Universe finally threw me a bone as I was making dinner. I got an order in the shop for a necklace. That means not only do I have something to get in the post today and a few more dollars in my account, I get get to start today with something that needs to be remade. For the first time in days, I actually know what I'll get up to after schooling the kids. It's kinds of sad how happy that actually makes me. I have something to accomplish and I'm hoping that it was a sign that things might be picking up again. I desperately miss feeling busy...at something I actually want to be doing.