Riding Out The Bumps

I have been through a great many growth spurts in recent history. I became a mother twice, exposed my "hobby" to the world for its approval and most recently I have laid my thoughts bare for all to see. All of these things have caused me great joy and even greater stress. As much as I love my children and revel in seeing them grow every day, they are most certainly the hardest job I have ever had. For every kind word, hug and kiss I am given in reward there are days of thankless tasks and unnoticed work. It is the same with my tatting and my blog, for every comment, sale or compliment there are weeks of feeling completely ignored. This causes all sorts of self doubt for me.

The ironic thing is, things have gotten much worse as things have gotten much better. Does that make any sense? I'll explain. When I was making a sale every week or two, all I expected was a sale every week or two. Low expectations meant that I could always meet expectations. When I first started my blog all I expected were a couple of readers and a comment now and again, so I was never disappointed. In the last couple of months things have gotten steady, not amazing by any means, but I began to rely on a certain amount of readers, a comment on every post and consistent sales. In fact I'm beginning to become so reliant on these things that when things don't play out this way, I am almost devastated. I start to wonder what I did wrong, who I upset, or what can I do to remedy the problem.

The problem however, does not actually exist. There is nothing for me to really fix, while I may have upset someone, that is probably not having any effect on my views or sales. These bumps along the way are normal. They may seem enormous, but that's just a trick of perspective. I've simply become so spoiled by a bout of good fortune that I mistook for an entirely new reality. It really is like the stock market, you can get excited at every up and devastated by every down, or you can go all in for the long haul and ride the waves as the come. You can try to fix every downturn immediately with a knee jerk reaction or you can make gradual and lasting changes that will result in long term success in whatever it is you do. It really is the zen thing to do.